So it begins.

This place is known as Kings Drive. But I've never seen a king here. Just a bunch of nothings. Peasants and Losers alike.

This is where I lived with my sister Maria. She lives here still. She lives on the corner house. Its a small 2 bedroom house. Small white wooden house. Nothing special but home you know?
She works at JC Penny as a cashier. Luckily we always somehow managed. I used to work at Kentucky Fried Chicken part time at nights. This way shed work during the day and Id take care of the kiddos, and during the nights when I worked shed take the kids. I see them as my own kids. better me than their real father. See like so many men in todays world they run at the first sign of responsibility. He bailed when it got hard and hasn't been seen ever since. (Ironically it reminds me allot of certain people where part of SFT). Anyway the bastard bailed and he never came back. Good riddance, cause if I do see him again. He's dead plain and simple, no discussions, no deals, just a bullet in the head. Goodbye Fucker!.

We begin.

Last night as we were having dinner we hear sirens. We're sorta used to them but still theyre sorta freaky each time we hear them. Its sorta something we come to get used to but never really do. My nephews jump up fromt heir chairs and run to the windows. I yell at them to sit down. They do as they are told. As I go to the window I see 1 ambulance and 2 police cruisers at Smiley's house. Smiley is my friend Gustavo. Everyone calls him Smiley though. Long story but its a fitting nickname. I tell Maria to keep the kids in the house till I figure out what went down. I open the door and cross the street. There's allot of commotion. Everyone is coming out of their house. Jerry comes over to me he says if I've heard what went down? I say no.

Jerry tells me that Smiley and Pepe been smoking crack since last night non stop. They were hold up in Smileys room and were paranoid through the roof. Yo, Shit like that happens out here everyday. People start to party and they cant stop, next thing they know a day or 2 has gone by and their seeing shit and hearing shit where there aint nothing to hear or see. It gets you crazy.

I ask then what?

Jerry tells me that Pepe wanted to pawn some of the coins that Smileys dad collects, their old and worth some shit if you know who to fence them to. Smiley said no, they argued, Pepe went for the coins and Smiley stabbed him in the stomach with a small switchblade.

I see as Pepe is being carted into the ambulance, he has the oxygen mask firmly attached to his mouth. He'll make it, we all know it, theres not allot of blood coming through the sheet. Pepe was lucky tonight. Not many of us from here get lucky. I turn my attention to Smiley. I feel bad for him. He got stuck in a situation with no out. He was high, strike 1, he was with a guy not afraid to use force, strike 2, and he couldnt call the cops cause theyd know they were high, strike 3 you're out.

I take a walk across the lawn. Smiley is being read his rights. You can see his eyes moving around. He is so scared. And rightfully so. Who knows what he may be booked for. If they got heavy on him he could face life, call it Attempted Murder, but he'll probably get booked for aggrevated assualt or some bs like that. Get a year or so and be back home before you know it. Smiley spots me. I can see in his eyes the amount of grief. He is worried for his moms and pops. His mom is at the front door crying, his pops aint even home from work yet. Smiley is seeing his little world slip away from him all from just one stupid mistake. I wish I could help him. I wish I could go over there and tell him that his life aint over. That one year behind bars wont be your end. People will not think less of you for being in jail. At least not in this neighborhood. People will not demand things from you that you cannot possibly give them. Life demands you pay a price for your crime. Only life has the ability to ask you to pay. No one else does. I lift up my hand in a fist. Smiley tries to give me a cool smile trying to tell me everything will be ok. He fails miserably, You see it wont be ok, and we both know it. Smiley has finally grown up. As kids he and I used to play baseball behind Mrs. Sanchez's house (she had the biggest yard) We grew up together, I have talked to him scarcely since I joined SFT. I've been trying hard to stay clean and out of trouble.

Smiley will learn the hard way what its like in jail. First few weeks he'll go through withdrawal he wont be in pain, just in a shitty mood and tired all the time. He wont know why he feels like that, but just that it sucks ass. Smiley will then probably join a gang, you need protection in real life as well as in the joint. He'll join Vallucos cause we got friends in there and they will welcome him quickly. He'll probably get in a fight quite a bit, so he'll be looking forward to solitary. But lucky for smiley he's a good reader. A few books in with him should help him keep his sanity. People think life out here is insane that some of us lose it. But most people, most people will never understand what true insanity and chaos is.

Smiley is escorted to the car. His moms runs to him but they wont allow him to get near her. The officers tell her she must wait for the arraignment before she can visit him. She is in tears. Her sister is there to comfort her. Later on that night that same aunt of Smiley will drive home and sell crack from her home. Wonder where he was getting it? We always get it from family homes...we keep it in the familia. That same aunt is calling Smiley a no good thug, but she'd gladly take his last 10 bucks for a rock if he had the cash. Fucking Bitch should be hung and slit like a pig. I push those thoughts away, they do no one any good.

Smiley is being driven away now and he looks around trying hard to soak in the neighborhood, I know what hes thinking, he's trying to take a picture and not forget it, never forget it. But he'll forget it soon enough, he's on his way to his new home. And some of us come to love that home.

But I have a new home, yet some seem to hurt it so.

I walk home and go inside. Maria asks me what happened. I simply say "Smiley got into some shit". She nods as if she knew it. she says "Figures".

We no longer talk about it. We finish dinner and do not talk for the rest of the night. There is tension with my sister and I. A part of her I know keeps expecting me to one day end up like Smiley and go back to jail. I served 8 months a few years back. Reasons being my own. It was not something I cherish or am proud of. But its a lesson I will not forget. I learned to appreciate my freedom and appreciate what I have and most of all appreciate what my sister did for me and gave me. I will never go back. And I so want to tell her this but I cant. I remain quiet and tell her I have to go. She looks at me, her eyes are asking me to stay.

"I have to go train, I have a match on Saturday" i say.

She nods. I kiss Joel and Daniel good night but they're too busy watching sponge bob square pants to pay much attention. lol

As I go to my car, I drive a beat up 1992 dodge ram truck, its a big boat but its mine I guess. its beat up as hell i got it at a police auction last year. As I turn on the car I think back to Smiley and it pisses me off, if id been there maybe things of been different, but deep down I know if id been there things would of probably been worse. And I thank god i wasnt there. I come to realize how much pain Smiley will suffer in this next year.

Fox arent you the one so found of saying "feel my pain". You believe that the thoughts in your mind make you different, somehow special? True pain Fox comes not in physical or emotional, but it comes from loss.

Knowing you just lost your life, your family and your future. That is true pain. Something that your words or mind can never truly grasp. What is pain Fox, you who are so fond of taking people into your world and showing them your pain, but they're just words aren't they? What do you really know of loss? You have no clue my friend. If you did, you'd be a different man.

Fox is the world and ic champion. He is the best this federation has to offer. He is the one we all look up to. but if you were to ask me who i look up to, it wouldn't be Fox. Fox you feel like making demands of Shadow and SFT? Well two can play that game. May I make some demands? I demand that you shut the Fuck up. I demand you not bite the hand that feeds you. I demand you know the whole story before you speak. You act the fool Fox, now I will be the one to make you act it. You and I were once part of the Dead Pac. But we never spoke much. You had your friend the pyro guy and I was still pretty new and didn't want to step on anyone's shoe. But somewhere deep down you think you're better than me. Hell I think you're better than me. I will freely admit that. But on Slaughter, for one night only I WILL BE BETTER THAN YOU. I will show you that to make a demand you must first be willing to take a demand. I demand of you nothing more than your understanding? That is all I ask. I ask that you understand me. Put yourself in my shoes and see the world through my eyes. If you accomplish this without acting the fool, then I will gladly look at the world through your eyes.

Last night I felt good for 2 minutes, and 2 minutes afterwards some dick from another fed took that away. And what do you do Fox? You who were my brother in the Pac. You sided with the dick and made a demand of our federation. tsk tsk Fox. Who are you to make demands? I dont see your blood on the walls. Well, at least not yet.

There is pain and suffering in this world of ours. You have inflicted so much. But the pain you could give me is nothing to the pain I have already endured. You are soft, and you wouldn't last a day in my world. But I will certainly outlast you in this world. SFT is a world in its own. And those who think me weak or without talent will wake up tomorrow and realize that they knew nothing about me. People prefer to think of me as weak and stupid. I am fine with that. I don't have an urge to prove them otherwise. But you Fox have awoken me. That was a big Fucking mistake.

You and I were both close to Legion. You learned so much from him, but so have I. I just didn't care whether I won or lose. Now I do care, if only for a little while. I will ask you the question he would of asked. Are you afraid of the dark? You should be, You will be.

Fade to Black.

Final thoughts as you leave my world is remember this, when I want to, I can #### each and every single one of you up. consider yourselves lucky I never had a reason to win. But I got one now don't I? unlucky for the ones who must face me from now on